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Kasey Kahl

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TV Reality Show Contestant

The Resume

    (November 21, 1982- )
    Born in United States
    Resides in Clovis, California
    Former AT&T Yellow Book salesman
    Former co-owner of 'California Fighter' magazine
    Ambassador/Spokesman for Nutrie Physical Fitness
    Former contestant on Ali Fedotowsky's season of The Bachelorette (Summer, 2010)
    Contestant on Season 2 of 'Bachelor Pad' along with then-girlfriend Vienna Girardi, competing against Vienna's ex, Jake Pavelka
    Participant in Season 2 of VH-1's 'Relationship Rehab' again with ex-girlfriend Vienna Girardi
    Trademark is his distinctively groggy, croaking voice and off-key singing; running joke is that it sounds like Kermit the Frog
    Catchphrase was 'guard and protect your heart'; famous for the tattoo on his right inner wrist depicting a shield in front of a heart surrounded by 11 stones representing the other contestants
    Charged with multiple felonies for allegedly attacking two people at a nightclub (Aug. 3, 2012)
    Sentenced to three years of probation and community service (Jul. 2013)

Why he might be annoying:

    His name sounds like that of <19686>a popular NASCAR driver<19686>.
    He could have passed as Smiley Burnette's illegitimate son & Alfalfa Switzer's half-brother.
    Fans claimed he sounded like Kermit having a stroke, but if anything he more readily resembled Muppet, Fozzie Bear, on acid.
    He (very ironically) described his looks as 'very Jake Pavelkian' in his Bachelorette profile.
    He and Vienna basically functioned as the Boris and Natasha of reality 'Bachelor Nation' TV.
    He alternately projected the image of being A) a clueless himbo or B) a whacked-out stoner, and then was shocked when social media nicknamed him 'Krazy Kasey.'
    A video of him awkwardly serenading a visibly uncomfortable Ali about their helicopter ride date went viral on YouTube, as did her unenthused response ('haha, yeah, that's pretty intense stuff...)
    He tried to argue that the video was just a case of 'selective editing' by the producers, but that he continually serenaded her over the course didn't help his case, nor did footage which surfaced soon after of him in a punk rock band letting out his characteristic croaking wail.
    He was known for erratic and strange behavior on his Bachelorette season, to the point where Fedotowsky claimed he wasn't serious enough for her.
    In response, he got a tattoo on his forearm depicting a heart being 'guarded' to show his seriousness and commitment, confident this would get him a rose (he was eliminated after he showed it to her on a two-on-one date).
    He waged a no-holds barred feud with Jake Pavelka, publicly trashing him at every given opportunity before even bothering to hear his side of the feud and repeatedly expressing his desire to 'punch him for America.'
    His relationship with Vienna was equally contentious, with the two erupting into explosive arguments throughout their 'Bachelor Pad' season (e.g. ripping the promise ring off of her finger after she refused to 'put out,' yelling for her to 'get over' Jake's physical/mental abuse because 'that was a year ago,' etc.)
    TMZ (perhaps unfairly) lampooned his stoic written apology to the couple he attacked outside a bar, delivered woodenly into a camera as part of his plea deal (Aug. 2013).

Why he might not be annoying:

    He is friends with DMX.
    He is a good-natured guy who literally wears his heart on his sleeve.
    He was kissed by Jessica Biel and hit on by Kirsten Dunst.
    He admitted on 'Relationship Rehab' to having been abused by several of his mother's boyfriends.
    He put a positive spin on the 'guard and protect' line, starting a charity for underprivileged children, 'Guard and Protect Hearts Inc.'
    The 'guard and protect your heart' line allegedly took form when he was a child, comforting his mother, who would cry herself to sleep in her closet.
    Erica Rose defended him from Vienna's accusations of abuse leveled on 'Relationship Rehab.'
    If anything, Vienna was the abusive one; publicly humiliating him on a regular basis and even balking when she mistakenly thought he was proposing to her ('I need a muzzle for you!').
    He was probably teased over his speech impediment in school, which couldn't have been a picnic back then (nowadays kids have Bobby Jindal to look up to...)
    He publicly made up with Pavelka at the 'Tell-All' episode (while a royally pissed Vienna glared vengefully at both men as they shook hands).
    He teared up publicly at the same event, apologizing for his behavior and claiming that his experience on the show broke him so that he 'can't get back to being happy.'
    He was able to put his life back together after his legal troubles and public breakup, happily settling into private citizenry without trouble.
    He remains a cult favorite with 'Bachelor Nation' fans, easily being one of the most quotable personalities from the franchise ('I'm goanna go take a Jake and wipe my Pavelka!')

Credit: BoyWiththeGreenHair


Featured in the following Annoying Collections:

Year In Review:

    In 2023, Out of 2 Votes: 100% Annoying
    In 2022, Out of 5 Votes: 100% Annoying
    In 2021, Out of 9 Votes: 88.89% Annoying
    In 2020, Out of 4 Votes: 75.00% Annoying
    In 2019, Out of 6 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2017, Out of 9 Votes: 55.56% Annoying
    In 2016, Out of 9 Votes: 66.67% Annoying
    In 2015, Out of 26 Votes: 53.85% Annoying