The Resume

(December 7, 1598-November 28, 1680)
Born in Naples, Italy
Sometimes referred to as Giovanni Lorenzo or Gianlorenzo
Baroque sculptor, painter, and architect
Worked under the patronages of Cardinal Scipione Borghese, Pope Paul V, Pope Urban VIII, Cardinal Richelieu, Francesco I d'Este, Charles I of England, Henrietta Maria of France, among many others
Sculptures include ‘Aeneas, Anchises, and Ascanius’ (1619), ‘Sleeping Hermaphroditus’ (1620), ‘The Rape of Proserpina’ (1622), ‘David’ (1624), ‘Apollo and Daphne’ (1625), and ‘Ecstasy of Saint Teresa’ (1652)
Painted ‘Self-Portrait as a Young Man’ (c. 1623), ‘Portrait of pope Urban VIII’ (c. 1625), ‘Saint Andrew and Saint Thomas’ (c. 1627), ‘Self-Portrait as a Mature Man’ (1630-1635), ‘Portrait of a Boy’ (c. 1638), and ‘Christ Mocked’ (c. 1644-1645)
Designed the Church of St. Thomas of Villanova (1661), Church of the Assunta (1664), and Sant'Andrea al Quirinale (1670)
Died in Rome, Italy

Why he might be annoying:

His wife was nineteen years younger than him.
He fell in love with one of his students and a married woman whose bust he sculpted.
He subsequently insulted her husband in public, causing Pope Urban VIII to arrange his marriage to prevent things from going haywire.
He ticked off the French court by boasting the superiority of Italian art and architecture over French ones.

Why he might not be annoying:

He was the leading sculptor of his time, sculpting sixty-five sculptures and designing five fountains in his lifetime.
Many of his sculptures have adorned Rome and the Vatican.
His sculptures focused on the narrative tension of well-known stories, which was a break from past traditions.
His friendliness enabled him to maintain solid relationships with his patrons.

Credit: Big Lenny

Featured in the following Annoying Collections:

• 17th Century Painters
• Architects
• Big Lenny's Profiles [Series 04]
• Born on Pearl Harbor Day [December 7th] (Ranked: 1598)
• Breeders [Have 5 or More Kids] (Ranked: 11)
• I Was Hot For My Student
• Look at Me, My Picture Is Art
• My Spouse is at Least Ten Years Younger than Me
• Painters
• Profiles 34751-35000 (Ranked: 34944)
• Sculptors

Year In Review:

In 2023, Out of 2 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2022, Out of 4 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2021, Out of 7 Votes: 85.71% Annoying
In 2020, Out of 4 Votes: 100% Annoying
In 2019, Out of 10 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2018, Out of 3 Votes: 33.33% Annoying
In 2017, Out of 3 Votes: 33.33% Annoying
In 2016, Out of 9 Votes: 11.11% Annoying
In 2015, Out of 10 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2014, Out of 20 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2013, Out of 48 Votes: 50.0% Annoying