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Zeno of Citium

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Philosopher

The Resume

    (333 BC-264 BC)
    Founder of Stoicism
    Author of 'The Republic'

Why he might be annoying:

    He believed that the universe itself was conscious.
    He was a merchant before he was a philosopher, who only discovered philosophy after he read a book that he had stumbled upon after being shipwrecked in Athens.
    He believed that in order for one to be happy, they must resign themselves to fate and never struggle against it.
    His favorite activities were eating figs and lying out in the sun.
    When he was an old man, he could not pay the tax that the Athenians required of resident aliens and was sold into slavery.
    He held that men and women should dress alike.

Why he might not be annoying:

    He learned to live a happy life without many material possessions.
    His friends bought him out of slavery.
    When he died, the city of Athens paid for him to be buried with a gold crown in an ornate tomb.
    Despite the reputation that later stoics had of being sober, he would often drink wine.
    He wrote his own 'Republic,' in which he described a utopia composed of rational citizens.
    He believed in the equality of the sexes.
    He despised modesty and believed that clothes should often be done without.
    He did not find any problems with masturbation, homosexuality, or prostitution.

Credit: Nihilism Cynicism Sarcasm Orgasm


Featured in the following Annoying Collections:

Year In Review:

    In 2023, Out of 3 Votes: 0% Annoying
    In 2022, Out of 1 Votes: 0% Annoying
    In 2021, Out of 8 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2020, Out of 3 Votes: 33.33% Annoying
    In 2019, Out of 2 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2018, Out of 2 Votes: 100% Annoying
    In 2017, Out of 4 Votes: 75.00% Annoying
    In 2016, Out of 1 Votes: 0% Annoying
    In 2015, Out of 6 Votes: 83.33% Annoying
    In 2014, Out of 13 Votes: 69.23% Annoying
    In 2013, Out of 20 Votes: 55.00% Annoying
    In 2012, Out of 7 Votes: 42.86% Annoying
    In 2011, Out of 19 Votes: 47.37% Annoying
    In 2010, Out of 23 Votes: 43.48% Annoying
    In 2009, Out of 20 Votes: 40.0% Annoying
    In 2008, Out of 31 Votes: 48.39% Annoying
    In 2007, Out of 66 Votes: 69.70% Annoying
    In 2006, Out of 107 Votes: 63.55% Annoying
    In 2005, Out of 176 Votes: 48.86% Annoying
    In 2004, Out of 415 Votes: 45.30% Annoying
    In 2003, Out of 181 Votes: 37.57% Annoying