The Resume

Appears in the Book of Genesis
Son of Judah
Nephew of Joseph
According to the Bible, ‘spilt his seed upon the ground’ rather than impregnate his wife Tamar

Why he might be annoying:

He is famous for only one thing: masturbating.
Since the Middle Ages, religious people have used his story to condemn masturbation, sex for pleasure, ‘coitus interruptus,’ contraception and homosexuality.
Some say he ‘spilt his seed’ because he wanted to weasel out of supporting a child.
His name inspired a euphemism for masturbation (‘onanism’).
He probably has the most embarrassing story in the entire Bible.

Why he might not be annoying:

He was forced to marry his dead brother’s wife.
God supposedly struck him dead for his ‘seed-spilling.’
He may simply have suffered from premature ejaculation, a fairly common problem among men.
After he died, his wife finally conceived a child by pretending to be a prostitute and seducing her father-in-law (but that’s another story).
He’s been celebrated in songs, books and comedy routines.
He may have been the first man to masturbate, but he was hardly the last.

Credit: Wieland Kalligaro

Featured in the following Annoying Collections:

• Ancient Times
• Ancient Times: Middle East
• I Am in the Bible
• I Died for My Sins
• I Made a Perverted Ass Out of Myself
• I'm Remembered in a Tribute Song
• Known By a Single Name
• Look at Me, I'm Grabbing My Crotch
• Look at Me, I'm Naked
• Look at Me, My Picture Is Art
• Look at My Flowers
• Profiles 17501-17750 (Ranked: 17654)
• Sabras - I am Israeli
• Wieland Kalligaro's Profiles [Series 8]

Year In Review:

For 2024, as of last weekly ranking, Out of 1 Votes: 0% Annoying
In 2023, Out of 9 Votes: 11.11% Annoying
In 2022, Out of 4 Votes: 0% Annoying
In 2021, Out of 11 Votes: 45.45% Annoying
In 2020, Out of 9 Votes: 33.33% Annoying
In 2019, Out of 18 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2018, Out of 361 Votes: 46.81% Annoying
In 2017, Out of 4 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2016, Out of 3 Votes: 100% Annoying
In 2015, Out of 6 Votes: 66.67% Annoying
In 2014, Out of 18 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2013, Out of 160 Votes: 56.25% Annoying
In 2012, Out of 492 Votes: 52.85% Annoying
In 2011, Out of 174 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2010, Out of 167 Votes: 58.68% Annoying
In 2009, Out of 105 Votes: 38.10% Annoying
In 2008, Out of 101 Votes: 64.36% Annoying
In 2007, Out of 156 Votes: 51.92% Annoying
In 2006, Out of 697 Votes: 40.75% Annoying