The Resume

(July 3, 1883-June 3, 1924)
Best known for his short story ‘The Metamorphosis (1912)’
Wrote ‘In the Penal Colony (1914),’ ‘A Hunger Artist (1922),’ ‘The Trial (1925),’ ‘The Castle (1926)’ and ‘Amerika (1927)’

Why he might be annoying:

He was gloomy and self-critical.
Although he often visited whorehouses, he found sex nauseating.
He was often mistaken for a teenager, even when he was much older.
He probably caused his own tuberculosis by drinking unpasteurized milk.
He was a vegetarian.
He once said: ‘German literature – may it roast in Hell.’
Many people only know him for his story about a guy who turns into a giant bug.

Why he might not be annoying:

He suffered from tuberculosis, migraines, boils, constipation – you name it.
He eventually starved to death when his throat closed up from TB.
He grew up poor.
He spoke several languages.
His fiancée broke off their engagement when another woman falsely accused him of impregnating her.
His brooding, existential writings inspired many other authors and thinkers.
Jeremy Irons played him in a movie directed by Steven Soderbergh.
Both his brothers died in infancy, and years after he died, his sisters were all murdered in a Nazi death camp.

Credit: Wieland Kalligaro

Featured in the following Annoying Collections:

• An Asteroid was Named in My Honor (Ranked: 3412)
• Cry Babies
• Entertainers Loved by Depressed Teens
• Google Modified Its Logo For My Birthday (Google Doodles)
• Hey! They Doctored My Photo
• I Died in 1924 (Ranked: 40)
• I Have Insomnia
• I Have Tuberculosis
• I was Estranged From My Parents
• I'm Depressed [Reportedly Anxiety]
• I'm Depressed [Reportedly Manic/Bi-polar]
• Influenced by Friedrich Nietzche
• Le Monde's 100 Books of the Century [1999] (Ranked: 3)
• Look at Me and My Pet
• Look at Me, I Got My Arms Folded
• Look at My Christmas Tree
• Look at My Santa Cap
• My Sibling was Murdered
• NPR's 100 Best Literary Characters of the 20th Century [Authors - 2002] (Ranked: 12)
• NPR's 100 Best Literary Characters of the 20th Century [Authors - 2002] (Ranked: 83)
• Profiles 14001-14250 (Ranked: 14111)
• Recluses
• Smoking Vegetarians
• Teetotalers
• Wieland Kalligaro's Profiles [Series 5]
• Writers Featured in the Barnes & Noble Authors Mural

Year In Review:

For 2024, as of last weekly ranking, Out of 1 Votes: 100% Annoying
In 2023, Out of 8 Votes: 25.00% Annoying
In 2022, Out of 3 Votes: 0% Annoying
In 2021, Out of 7 Votes: 28.57% Annoying
In 2020, Out of 3 Votes: 66.67% Annoying
In 2019, Out of 12 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2018, Out of 2 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2017, Out of 6 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2016, Out of 335 Votes: 74.93% Annoying
In 2015, Out of 18 Votes: 44.44% Annoying
In 2014, Out of 28 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2013, Out of 7 Votes: 57.14% Annoying
In 2012, Out of 16 Votes: 56.25% Annoying
In 2011, Out of 18 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
In 2010, Out of 45 Votes: 68.89% Annoying
In 2009, Out of 29 Votes: 51.72% Annoying
In 2008, Out of 96 Votes: 42.71% Annoying
In 2007, Out of 146 Votes: 51.37% Annoying
In 2006, Out of 1115 Votes: 40.0% Annoying
In 2005, Out of 335 Votes: 44.18% Annoying