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Jeffrey Epstein

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The Resume

    (January 20, 1953-August 10, 2019)
    Born in Coney Island, New York City, New York
    Full name is Jeffrey Edward Epstein
    Founder of J. Epstein & Co. (est. 1982)
    Former options trader at Bear Stearns
    Formed the Jeffrey Epstein VI Foundation, raising funds for science research and education (est. 2000)
    Convicted of soliciting prostitution of a minor; received an 18-month prison sentence (June, 2008)
    Allegedly procured girls as young as 12 to service professional colleagues on a 72-acre island in the Virgin Islands, called Little St. James (nicknamed 'Orgy Island')
    Registered Level-3 Sex Offender

Why he might be annoying:

    He engaged in a 2008 bidding war to buy ownership of 'New York Magazine.'
    He was named in a Palm Beach police affidavit, alleging that he had solicited the services of a 14-year-old girl at his mansion (Mar. 2005).
    The report resulted in the police launching an 11-month undercover investigation identifying 40 cases involving girls as young as 14, at the time, all of them lured to his home on the pretense of giving a 'paid massage' only to be sexually propositioned.
    The stories of his proclivities extracted from the FBI were almost too sickening to believe (e.g. receiving three 12-year old French girls for a birthday present).
    He allegedly boasted of purchasing a 'Balkan sex slave' -- whom he would 'loan' to his friends -- from her family when she was just 14.
    A search of his home yielded incriminating evidence: not only photos of girls the FBI had previously interviewed, but concealed bedroom cameras used to blackmail his wealthier clients being caught 'in the act.'
    His activity existed at an unfathomable scope; running a 'Lolita Express' jet route for wealthy men to cavort to a 72-acre St. James-Virgin island estate he owned, which has variously been dubbed 'Sex Slave Island' and 'Pedophile Island.'
    He got off with a ridiculously lenient sentence, barely serving a year of his 18-month sentence, carried out in a private wing of the Palm Beach jail (from which he was still allowed a daily 16-hour pass from the property to conduct his business dealings).
    Interestingly, when 31-year-old Virginia Roberts, signed a sworn affidavit, in 2015, alleging that she had been trafficked by Epstein to Prince Andrew, she also named Alan Dershowitz - who served on his legal team, as a frequent visitor to his 'Island' (talk about a quid pro quo...)

Why he might not be annoying:

    He came from a Jewish family of humble means, in Brooklyn.
    He taught calculus and physics at The Dalton School, in Manhattan.
    He donated funds to the American Cancer Society.
    He funded the research of several prominent scientists, including Stephen Hawking.
    His Foundation has funded genetic/molecular biological research into the treating of Alzheimer's, multiple sclerosis, various forms of cancer, HIV-AIDS, and Crohn's disease
    His ties to both Bill Clinton and Donald Trump essentially neutralize him as a potent threat to the Presidential ambitions of either Trump or Clinton's wife (when in any other cycle, a candidate's involvement with such a man would be toxic fodder).

Credit: BoyWiththeGreenHair


Featured in the following Annoying Collections:

Year In Review:

    For 2024, as of last weekly ranking, Out of 27 Votes: 81.48% Annoying
    In 2023, Out of 149 Votes: 58.39% Annoying
    In 2022, Out of 1355 Votes: 57.79% Annoying
    In 2021, Out of 1220 Votes: 61.89% Annoying
    In 2020, Out of 2406 Votes: 65.13% Annoying
    In 2019, Out of 1906 Votes: 64.06% Annoying
    In 2018, Out of 13 Votes: 46.15% Annoying
    In 2017, Out of 1777 Votes: 93.58% Annoying
    In 2016, Out of 45 Votes: 60.0% Annoying