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Randy Cunningham
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U.S. Congressman
    (December 8, 1941- )
    Nicknamed 'Duke'
    U.S. Representative from California (1991-2005)
    He constantly used his office for financial gain and then lied about it to his constituency when questioned.
    He illegally sold a $595 knife branded with the seal of Congress on his official website.
    He was fanatically conservative and once called another member of the House a homo during a debate.
    He argued for the death penalty for drug dealers. Then his son was caught smuggling 400 lbs. of marijuana and he begged the judge for leniency.
    He was known for his frequent angry outbursts on the House floor.
    When a defense contractor took a loss of $700,000 purchasing his house, he announced, 'I feel very confident that I haven't done anything wrong.'
    Like most lying hypocritical shitheads, he is fond of using hyperboles.
    Eventually he decided not to seek another term in office, but still maintained he was innocent (June 2005).
    Facing harsh prison time if he kept lying, he finally admitted to accepting bribes and pled guilty to charges of tax evasion, conspiracy to commit bribery, mail fraud and wire fraud (November 28, 2005).
    He hardly covered the paper trail to his crimes and then cried like an idiot when he didn't magically get away with it.
    In his resignation speech from the House, he flaunted his faith, age and Vietnam War experience.
    Republicans hate him for drawing attention to their party's corruption.
    He failed at business before entering politics.
    He was the first of only two Vietnam War aces.
    His experiences during flight training were partly the basis for 'Top Gun' (1986).
    He was a CNN commentator during the 1991 Persian Gulf War.
    He was ordered to give most of the bribe money he received back (but not all of it, for some stupid reason).
    He was caught and faces up to 10 years in jail.

Credit: Captain Howdy

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