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Thaïs

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Mistress

The Resume

    Born in Athens (Attica), Greece
    Mistress to both Alexander the Great and Ptolemy I Soter
    Ancient Greek courtesan famous for accompanying Alexander the Great on his military campaigns throughout Asia Minor (330 BC)
    Had a key role in instigating the burning of Persepolis (in modern-day Iran)

Why he might be annoying:

    She is confused with the Catholic Saint of the same name (who was also a courtesan).
    She likely influenced Ptolemy to plot against Alexander.
    She instigated the burning of Persepolis as an act of revenge.
    She did so at a banquet with several Persian officials in attendance (awkward).
    She is believed to have taken advantage of Alexander and his guests' intoxicated state to convince them to burn down the Persian Royal palace.
    She was allegedly either the first or second person to throw a flaming torch into the pyre that was Persepolis.
    She may have cheated on Alexander for Ptolemy, although some think she was discarded for another woman, thereby 'freeing her up.'
    She was Ptolemy's common-law wife, but she never functioned as his Queen - a role designated for his other wife (bigamy).
    If Dante was telling the truth, she went to Hell (and straight into a trench of excrement reserved for skanks).

Why he might not be annoying:

    Her daughter married the King of Soli in Cyprus.
    She was described as vivacious, witty, and charming, but also ambitious.
    She was a gifted orator - allegedly so skilled as to move grown men to commit an act of arson.
    She was romantically involved with two of the most influential leaders in the history of Ancient Greece.
    She bore Ptolemy three children but they were not recognized as royal heirs.
    She furnished the sexual imaginations of Ovid, Cicero, Terence, Marlowe, and Dryden.
    She was a young girl when she witnessed her home city get ravaged, plundered, and burnt by King Xerxes and his Persian army (karma's a bitch, baby).
    Her role in the burnings may have been exaggerated by historians like Plutarch, likely looking for yet another convenient female scapegoat.

Credit: BoyWiththeGreenHair


Featured in the following Annoying Collections:

Year In Review:

    For 2024, as of last weekly ranking, Out of 2 Votes: 0% Annoying
    In 2022, Out of 2 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2021, Out of 7 Votes: 100% Annoying
    In 2019, Out of 48 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2018, Out of 34 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2017, Out of 8 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2016, Out of 8 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2015, Out of 15 Votes: 53.33% Annoying